버추버 인터렉티브_이현님

SPECIAL

버추버 인터렉티브_이현님

2024.10.14

Try clicking each VTuber and their signs!

Starting out

LeeHyunNim

When I first started streaming, I didn’t know a single thing about it, and the whole concept of being a VTuber was pretty new, so it felt pretty unusual. I got started with streaming because I thought the way Internet streamers interact with lots of people and create memories with their fans was really cool, but sticking strictly to illustrations clearly came with limitations, so I ended up transitioning to VTubing, which I felt could help me get past that and allow me to show facial expressions and make gestures. Different kinds of characters are popular at different times, and back when I got started, being cool was all the rage. People with cool voices, a cool appearance, and who did cool things were taking off. But when I thought about what makes me special, I realized I don’t have a cool voice or say cool things, and anyway, I’m more reserved than that. I’m not into the things other people like—a lot of my interests are more unusual. I’m not the type to follow in someone else’s footsteps. I’m upfront about my status as an outsider. (laughs) I’m not a part of any in-groups and I’m never in the spotlight. I’m an outsider who chooses to be alone and speaks his mind about topics most other people don’t talk about much. I’m a multifaceted individual who wanders about freely without belonging anywhere, and the object that best represented that was a sheet of paper. After all, paper holds infinite possibilities. Shapes or lines drawn on a white canvas become a picture, notes placed on a staff become a score, and writing on manuscript paper becomes a book. Paper itself holds endless possibilities, and I felt I held similar potential. That’s how I chose the way I look.

Music

LeeHyunNim

When I first started streaming, the concept of VTubers or making original songs was unheard of. If you look at the earliest comments on my videos, a lot of them were like, “Is this an original song?” Or, “Was this not already a song? Did LeeHyunNim really write this himself?” You don’t really get as much out of making songs as you get putting in, and it’s hard to make one if you’re not a professional, but since I already had my own way of working and had no problem expressing myself openly, I was able to start making original songs right off the bat, even though it wasn’t common back then. So people were like, Apparently streamers can put out their own music, too. And for us [VTubers], music is more or less just another way of showing ourselves off to the world, so it’s not something that really makes or breaks everything—it’s more seen as something to just have fun with. When I’m working alone, I try to let myself loose more and not get hung up on any one thing. I’m not really going for perfection, just trying to express myself as best I can for the most part. When I’m collaborating with someone, though, my focus is on getting as close to perfection as possible so I won’t cramp their style. And I value being on the same wavelength highly when I’m collaborating with someone, so I try and communicate with them as much as possible so we can both do what we want to do. VTubers in general tend to have pride and confidence in their work, and have their own style and a unique world of their own. They make a space for me to step into their world and I make sure they’re comfortable stepping into mine by dealing with any conflicts as soon as they arise and always making sure we’re doing what we want and having fun when we work together.

Trying new things

LeeHyunNim

I’m not sure what people think of VTubers exactly, but personally, I see VTubers and streamers as artists, sort of. This is a job where we give the people entertainment and they love us in return, so it’s a job where there’s a very real possibility of falling into a rut and regressing. People aren’t perfect, and sometimes they regress, and sometimes viewers don’t like what they see, but the real issue is that it’s not just the streamer who’s regressing. My fans like me and look forward to my work, and they tend to follow me closely, so if I end up feeling stuck, or feel like I should stick with one thing, or feel like I should shift gears a little, a lot of times my viewers feel that pressure, too. That’s why I always try to keep moving forward, step by step, even if it’s slow going, and try and keep it as fun as possible in the process, but it’s not easy, to be honest. The balance between risk and reward when trying out new forms of content leans way more heavily in the case of failure. And you could just take the easy way out and follow in everyone else’s footsteps without ever trying to break new ground, but then you’re inevitably limiting yourself in what you’re able to share with the world. It’s like how you’re just watching the scenery go by when you’re on a train, but if you ride your bike, you get to see so many different things, and pick up smells and use all your other senses, too. I wanted to give people more of that new world. If I just settle for sticking with what I’ve always done, it’s almost like I’m making the world seem so limited for the people who follow me. I want to show that there’s all these other worlds out there and expand our own worlds too. And if I try new things, I’m not the only one witnessing that world or walking that path alone—since my viewers get to witness it too—so I muster up the courage by continually reminding myself not to feel like I’m alone.

“I Wanna Be a Streamer When I Grow Up”

LeeHyunNim

Since I don’t have a lot of life experience, and because, just like I introduce my special world to others, I really like to learn a lot about other people’s world through what they say, I love listening to what other people have to say. And so, naturally, when I got to connect with streamers I had always envied, I wanted to hear their stories, too. (laughs) There’s VTubers and streamers I still look up to and who are big stars in my eyes, but then I found out that the people who shone like stars to me were actually satellites all along—and just like how you look up and think you see a star but it turns out it was an artificial satellite the whole time, these people were people on the inside just like me, and privately experiencing sadness and troubles of their own. The irony of being a streamer is that you’re always communicating with people but you don’t actually have much room to talk about yourself. If you’re too blunt, you could break the format of the stream you’re aiming for and have been doing all along, and there’s stuff you don’t want to reveal about yourself, so you have to keep it all inside a lot of the time. I wanted to create a space to talk about things like that, a place where you can be yourself and not worry about what you say, which is why I created I Wanna Be a Streamer When I Grow Up.

“It’s harder to live than die”

LeeHyunNim

I have a song called “It’s harder to live than die,” and one of my favorite parts goes, “Even if you stop , the world still moves well / The world still revolves well without you / Don’t worry; just leave it alone / The future doesn’t take care of the present you / It treats it like someone else’s business.” It’s a proudly defiant song. People are always saying, Why make such a bad decision? Just try and do a little something—anything, or, You should’ve done something, anything! Why did you have to make such a bad decision? But like the song says, it’s harder to live than die, and my message when writing the lyrics was that, while it might not seem like a big deal, it’s actually quite a feat to keep going day in and day out these days. Some people try to take the weight of the world on all by themselves. I’ve been there, too. They worry because the future’s uncertain and overwork themselves in the meantime. They put up with the present and make sacrifices for the sake of the future, but when they finally get there, they dismiss all the aches and pains they went through by saying that’s just how it was back then. I wrote that part because I found it really strange the way people write all that hard stuff off like it’s nothing, and that’s why it’s so memorable to me.

“Moving forward”

LeeHyunNim

Some people misunderstand the fact that it doesn’t really matter how fast you go or the path you’re taking—all that matters is that you’re moving forward. Time presses on, even if you’re not doing a thing. As long as you’re not moving backwards during that time, you’re always progressively moving forward, absolutely. And you can take little breaks, too. That doesn’t mean you’re giving up—it means you’re getting ready to keep your life on track and take that next step. It feels like everybody in the world’s rushing around these days. Personally, I’ve had plenty of times where I fell to my knees, and sometimes I even worry I’m falling behind and shut myself up in my room. But when I look back now, it turns out those were all life experiences for me and adding to the stockpile for the future. I once took time off from university and became an isolated hikikomori for two years. I thought I was just throwing time away. For two years, I didn’t do anything but sit at home and watch anime or play games. But now I’m working on videos related to anime, creating music that tells stories, and do game-related streams. Those experiences are why I used the phrase “moving forward” and not “rushing forward.” The steps I was taking weren’t all that big, but just by going through the motions or dedicating the time, it was just like it was pushing me forward. So even though the world keeps spinning quickly, and there are people out there who rush around and find success, I wanted to say that it’s okay to take your time because you’ll still reach your destination as long as you don’t give up. You might question yourself when you see others running around or doing cool things while you’re out there trying your best to do things your own way, but I wanted to tell people not to stop moving forward just because they’re worried about running and falling down and breaking something or getting hurt. Instead of rushing forward blindly, I hope people keep moving forward while keeping within the limits that work for them. I hope they don’t give up and that they don’t give up on the race. That’s what I had in mind when I wrote the words, “moving forward.”