As a member of BTS, he paints a picture of hope. As a solo artist, he has opened a Pandora’s box, revealing to the world his inner thoughts. So, what allows him to keep going as j-hope after all this time? Himself, the group, and ARMY—the thesis-antithesis-synthesis of j-hope.
It’s been just about two months since you were discharged from the military. [Note: This interview was conducted on December 7.]
j-hope: It feels like I woke up from a really long dream. (laughs) For the first two or three weeks after I got out, all I talked about was the military. (laughs) It was a meaningful time that taught me how to find happiness in the little things as regular, everyday Jeong Hoseok. Someone who came into our squad in the last wave at my level just two months after me is about to be discharged too. When I said, “You’re getting out too, huh?” he replied, “Yeah, time flies. But it was fun thanks to you.” Knowing that the rest of them had a good time and are left with good memories of those times was really touching. I found it really fulfilling and meaningful being able to create that kind of atmosphere so effortlessly.
Your fellow soldiers have shared lots of heartwarming stories about you. What kind of role were you looking to play during your service?
j-hope: The hierarchy was really strict in my unit, so I still addressed the soldiers who were younger than me Sergeant and “Assistant Drill Sergeant, sir.” I tried my best to fulfill the role assigned to me and give it my all. It’s like how in BTS we actually show each other more respect because we’re a group. I tried to do the same in the army. Since my actions determined what kind of memories each person would have left of me, I tried to respect certain boundaries, which I think made other people like me more and feel more at ease around me.
The past year and a half must have been quite different from your normal life.
j-hope: It was a really important period for me. Nobody enters the military lightheartedly. It’s a tough, challenging journey, and at times psychologically demanding. But I felt like integrating into that society as Jeong Hoseok would make me into more of an adult and that the personal development would act as a good steppingstone for me. There were hard times, sure, but getting through them, and getting closer with people on a more personal level by communicating with them, helped me gain some insight. Literally—I even gained some weight. (laughs) Eating three square meals a day will do that to you. (laughs) That year and a half as Jeong Hoseok also gave me time to reflect on j-hope. It was a chance to look back on everything I’ve done, so it really was time well spent. When I first got discharged, I talked about how I changed, how I’m more mature, and all that, but now I feel like I’m back to being my old self. I haven’t forgotten all those valuable memories, but what I want to say is, I’ve settled into being this new version of j-hope.
You spent some time in Los Angeles recently, which must’ve helped you find this version of j-hope. You explained on Weverse LIVE that you took that trip to the US so you could more quickly readjust yourself back to the world you knew from before.
j-hope: Even before I enlisted, I was thinking about studying and working on music in LA. And over time, that thought gradually became a plan and a reality. As you live your life, there end up being things you need to demonstrate and things you want to do. Consequently, my plans ended up changing and then I had to make it a short, packed trip. I took off suddenly to the US a week after getting out of the army, but I still wasn’t even used to life in Korea again, so I really had a hard time adjusting. It wasn’t easy adapting to the culture and getting into the pace and vibe of the US, but then as I started meeting people and using English, and tried doing things I couldn’t do before, it just clicked—like, “Ah, I’m really here and settling in.” As soon as I faced reality, it really hit me just what was happening to me.
Why LA, though?
j-hope: I like everywhere in the States, but Cali’s got a vibe of its own that I love. I like the sun, the atmosphere, and how laid-back it is. Plus, all the music people everyone talks about are there. (laughs) Actually, the whole point of me going to the US was connected to my work under the name j-hope, so that’s where I started. It was obvious that LA was where I needed to go. And in the end, being there in the States helped me get back into the flow of everyday life and get used to being me again, which was immensely helpful.
It sounds like you’re solidifying the artistic vision you already had.
j-hope: Exactly. Solidifying is really hard, though. It doesn’t always come out smoothly. (laughs) I’m always thinking about what direction to take j-hope in, not just when I was in the US. (laughs)
Your most recent album, Jack In The Box, as well as HOPE ON THE STREET VOL.1, showed how much effort you put into bringing your vision to life, right down to the tiniest details under your direction.
j-hope: I want to say I’ve done a lot of things I wanted to do. And that whole sentence—“I,” “have done,” “a lot,” “of things I wanted to do”—is inspiring to me. I feel like every period of my work is exactly what I wanted at the time. That means I did things that I only could’ve done then, and that’s why the past is such a precious thing. Sure, I think about what it would’ve been like if I did something differently just like anyone else would, but I don’t have any regrets. If you asked me to do it all again exactly the same as before, phew—there’s no way I could. (laughs) I doubt I could pull off black eye makeup and a jumpsuit nowadays. (laughs) It's like, I already tried what I wanted to, so I should do what everybody else wants me to do now, too—what people think of when they think of j-hope’s music, image, and performances. It’s all connected. The reason I can think that way today and think the way I’ll think next is because of who I was in the past.
On the one hand, there’s the introspective j-hope who digs deep, and on the other, there’s the more upbeat side of you we hear in songs like “Chicken Noodle Soup” (feat. Becky G). Do you think most people consider j-hope to be that latter side of you?
j-hope: I think I should work toward whatever they think of when they think “j-hope”—the j-hope everyone thinks of: fun, lively, but never too lighthearted. And maybe—now that I’m back from the military—mature, skillful, and … it’s a bit cringey for it to come from me, but a bit sexy, too. This is the first time I’ve felt like that while working on music. I used to think whatever I like would work, but now I’m considering others’ ideas, too. That feels like a necessity. At this point, there’s a limit to what I can do if I’m only doing the things I want to do. I’m still completely involved in all things musical, obviously, and my mark’s all over them, so it’s still my music, but if my old way was stitching everything by hand, now it’s more like I’m trying on designer clothes and checking the fit—and then I’m on my way to the red carpet. I have to be careful how I word this, but I want to give people a bit of a better idea of who this j-hope person is.
What led you to that decision?
j-hope: It’s about wanting to approach them with what they expect from me. I could’ve chosen a different vibe for Jack In The Box, but if I had, I might not feel the same way now. Did I really cover everything I wanted to? Maybe not. There’s still so much I want to do. That’s kind of the problem. (laughs) But still, now feels like the right time for this, and it doesn’t feel weird to me. I really hate doing things that feel weird to me. But I felt like this would be something I could enjoy. And once I’ve done this, the experiences I get out of it will help me with whatever music comes next, so I’m excited to see what kind of music comes out of it later. I want to enjoy how I fill my canvas. That’s why I’m so focused on everything right now.
It seems like you’re able to take a step back and see yourself and the situations you’re in more objectively now.
j-hope: I look at things from within the bounds of what I’m able to. And I ask people for their opinions a lot. I ask my family and the people at the label, too. It’s not like I wasn’t always that way, but now I ask more frequently. What do you think? Would it be okay if I did that? Then I listen, consider the options, and then I make my choice. I read a lot of letters when I was in the army and I had some extra time. ARMY really poured their hearts into those letters (laughs) saying, I hope you’ll try this or that. They really, really inspired me. They really want me to do this. They think that’d be a good idea. If there’s some overlap with my own ideas, I take it into consideration and get some feedback on it. Stepping back like that helps me figure out what people want and what I need to focus on.
When you get input from that many different people, you have to stay grounded in yourself.
j-hope: You definitely need to stay grounded to the core. If I lost that, would I even be who I am today? I’m here now because I never lost it. Even I can be pretty stubborn, though. (laughs) I listen to what’s helpful and I’m eager to let go of what’s not. That’s just my style. I have principles. (laughs)
Maybe that’s why you’re so sure about what you want to do. Is there a reason why you’re after your specific artistic vision?
j-hope: I don’t think I’ve ever really thought about a “reason” for it. If there’s a reason, isn’t it too much like work? (laughs) I do this because I want to, and because it intuitively feels fun when I express myself. When it comes to creating something, I love to follow my instincts and go where they take me.
It seems like you follow your instincts but never compromise on the final product, especially when you took on everything by yourself for your performance at Lollapalooza in Chicago in 2022.
j-hope: Looking back now, I have no idea how I pulled off that Lollapalooza performance. (laughs) Those were tough times, but in the end I just did it and tried to put on a good show. ARMY still talks about Lollapalooza, so I’m thinking I’ll have to give them more now that I’m out of the military. Right now I’m working out the details and coming up with a more concrete picture. (laughs) It feels like there’s certain things I’m destined to do. It’s clear how I’m able to bring joy to people, and that’s through performing. I want to show what I can do. I want to keep performing and bring people happiness.
You said solidifying your vision is hard, but it sure seems like you’ve got a clear image in your head all lined up. (laughs)
j-hope: Yes, it’s simple. Really simple. There’s nothing complex about it right now. I just want to give them something fun, something that suits me, something I can pull off—something a little easier. Ultimately, I want to give them an album that reflects a more widely encompassing version of myself. I think it’s my job to keep being creative. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it’s my calling. I love music as much as ever, I love the stage, and want to enjoy it all from the performer’s perspective. I want to keep thinking about who I am, keep doing things that reflect that, and show people I’m the kind of person who keeps moving forward and making new things. I’m working hard to make sure it shows.
That must be another side of the responsibility you feel as a member of BTS.
j-hope: The thing is, BTS started with hip hop at its foundation and progressively became more pop-oriented. Throughout that process, we tried so many different songs—some fit me like a glove, while others felt a little off but I could still suck in my stomach to make them work. (laughs) Then we all went off doing our own thing, each with our own style. After pursuing our own little ventures, we are now coming back together, and I love that for us. At this point, I think we’re together because we genuinely enjoy each other’s company and get along. That’s what makes our work as a team so natural and effortless. And if you enjoy and appreciate each other’s company, it doesn’t matter if the clothes are a little tight at times because your hearts would still be in the right place. With that in mind, I believe the next step for BTS is to think about how we can shine as a team without diminishing our individual colors and identities.
It must feel novel seeing the other members put out solo work in their own styles after working together as a group for so long.
j-hope: What’s interesting about the members is that they all made a lot of stuff in advance before joining the army. It’s inspiring on so many levels. It’s amazing how they put so much thought into their work, how ambitious they are, and how much they want to express themselves. There’s nothing more beautiful than saying what’s in your heart, especially through music. It’s just beautiful, isn’t it? I love watching what Jin’s coming out with. He had stuff he wanted to put out but couldn’t because he enlisted first, but now that he’s doing it, I can see clearly what he wanted to do all along. And now I keep thinking, since he did that, I should do this.
After all that personal exploration, and everything you’ve been through with the group, what have you discovered about BTS?
j-hope: There are certainly things we need to do as BTS. When we’re all back together as a group, it’s going to have a huge impact, and everybody’s going to be watching. I’m excited to see what it’ll feel like when we perform together again. I want to come back in style and say, “This is us. This is BTS.” I can’t speak for everyone, but I can tell you the other members feel the same way. What hasn’t changed is that I really, really love to do it. Even now. I’m here because of the group. And working with the others is still so fun and fulfilling and makes me so, so happy. And most importantly of all, we made it here with ARMY at the heart of it all, and that’s something we must never forget or be lost on us as we continue moving forward. It’s incredible. They’re the whole reason I made it through. (laughs) They’re always there waiting, watching, supporting, and acknowledging. ARMY is the reason I can keep moving forward. They’re like the gas to my car, or… just my core?
Knowing there’s always someone there waiting for you must mean a lot.
j-hope: Of course. ARMY keeps me walking, like they’re my feet keeping me up, and my muscles, my cells, my neurons—all of that. (laughs) That’s all I can say, really.