“I just need some space.” In the music video for “Viola,” the lead single off Yves’ second EP, I Did, the artist dances with a radiant smile despite being surrounded by empty gazes. Then, as a truck carrying the remains of her “shattered stage” drives off, she stares blankly at “my numb self.” In short, I Did is an exploration of the joy, anxiety, and emptiness every single person experiences—and that flash of emotion after letting all of it go. So naturally, I wanted to ask her about the emotional rollercoasters she’s been through, from her time with girl group LOONA to her solo debut, and the marks they’ve left on her music.

You’re having a jam-packed year, from the seventh anniversary of your debut to two solo albums and an end-of-year tour. And even with all that going on, you’ve kept up with blogging. What’s your day-to-day life been like these days?
Yves: The reason I write and keep up with my blog even when I’m busy is because it’s always fun. I express my thoughts through all kinds of posts whenever there’s a moment worth celebrating with Engdu. Writing like that also helps other people understand the emotions behind my music. My favorite place to be lately is in my room: It’s almost soundproof, so I can turn off the lights and focus on practicing my singing or watching videos completely. It’s become somewhere I love to be. I’ve also been obsessed with a singing bowl that my uncle gifted me. When I have concerns or trouble sleeping, the way they ring out helps me calm down. I’ve even started playing it and watching videos about it. (laughs)

I hear you’re also a big soccer fan, and that Millic, the head of your label, PAIX PER MIL, is too. Do you two talk about soccer much?
Yves: There’s only two things we watch together when we have the TV on while eating: One is soccer highlights, and the other is Infinite Challenge. Since he knows a lot about soccer, he explains a lot of things and provides entertaining commentary. And we memorize lines from Infinite Challenge together while watching it. (laughs) He treats me like we’re cousins even when working. He keeps things so relaxed that I can be totally open with him.

After having been in a K-pop group, you joined PAIX PER MIL as a solo artist, with Millic, known for his work as a hip hop and alternative producer, at the helm. I bet you were both really looking forward to working together.
Yves: After our first meeting, he sent me a long text that said, “I think you have a lot of potential, and I want to draw out your unique talent as your director moving forward. You’re an immensely compelling artist.” I was really delighted about that message. It made me feel like signing with PAIX PER MIL would let me develop a distinct identity as an artist, so I did. The label has a very easygoing atmosphere. For me, though, if you include the time I spent as a trainee, I spent nearly seven years in the idol-centric entertainment world, and that’s what I was used to, so I was a little rigid at first. But the management told me, “Since you’re making music, you need to be able to express your own opinions,” which pushed me to be more open about my ideas. I even made a PowerPoint for my first meeting when we were working on my debut solo song. I proposed that, instead of going for a completely new image, we should keep my existing one to some degree while experimenting with genre and showing something original about my character. After brainstorming together like that, we arrived at “LOOP,” a house track with the image of an otherworldly girl. I really appreciate how they put my opinions first like that. Being a solo artist means having a much wider spectrum of things to think about compared to being in a group, which can feel overwhelming at times, but I see it as an invaluable opportunity to express what I love, so I feel confident and I’m having fun with it.

You were involved with songwriting even during your time with LOONA, and you’ve been actively involved in the visual direction of things since going solo, including creating mood boards.
Yves: My goal is to create music that engages multiple senses. I want it to go beyond just music and construct the images people imagine while listening—and that includes fashion. I’ve always loved movies and art exhibitions, and unsurprisingly, I’m influenced by those. My mom’s been running a vintage clothing shop since I was a kid, and I used to try different things on and ask her, “What do you think?” Doing that and taking photos slowly developed my artistic eye. And during my time with the group, I would personally produce tracks and have A&R listen to them. After going solo, I’d go to the studio I rent and work on pieces of songs day by day and share them with Engdu. It was my way of telling them, “Don’t worry, I’m still making music.” Choreography is another crucial aspect. My goal is to create music where choreography, fashion, and singing all come together seamlessly.

How did that approach influence the outfits and choreography for “Viola,” the lead single off your new album, I Did?
Yves: When I was promoting my previous single, “LOOP,” I wore a lot of dressy outfits to portray an otherworldly girl, but this time around, given how the lyrics are an open exploration of my emotions, I suggested that sporty and casual would be a better fit. Since each track on this album represents a different side of me, I didn’t stick to one cohesive look. Instead, I highlighted something unique with each outfit. When it comes to the performance, I always try to figure out what kind of choreography would suit the song best. Hip hop choreo came to mind as soon as I heard the demo for “Viola.” I was convinced that incorporating big, rhythmic hip hop moves into the hyperpop song would give us something fresh to perform, and I think taking that approach also let me show off what makes hyperpop new and exciting.

The way you switch up your facial expressions every time you perform “Viola” is fantastic. The words you’re singing are pretty heavy, but sometimes you’ll put on a big smile, and other times a more wistful look.
Yves: I put a lot of thought into my facial expressions, too, and I decided to express exactly what I was feeling each time I got up onstage. When the heavy lyrics really hit me, I’d keep a neutral expression or look melancholy. But when I felt like just casting off all my worries—like the part at the beginning of the song where the robotic voice says, “Let’s get dumb and break shit”—I’d break out into a big smile and fully embrace the joy of performing.

The visual aspect of the music video feels important, too. The way faces keep looking at you seems to tie in with the line, “I just need some space.”
Yves: With this album, both Millic and I placed the most focus on making it autobiographical, so I wanted to be honest about my anxieties, my worries, and my moments of sadness. I also hoped listeners would find solace in my music and realize that feelings like that aren’t something to be ashamed of. On the one hand, I derive happiness and a sense of purpose in my career from others’ perceptions of me, but on the other, it can also hurt me and make me like I’m spiraling deep into myself. But I also realize that, for the sake of my music, I can never separate myself from those views.

Another standout piece of imagery in the music video is the circle motif, like the mosquito coil superimposed on top of you.
Yves: There’s a line in “Viola” that goes, “Watching my numb self from behind my shattered stage,” and that line really resonated with me because I feel like it mirrors how I’ve fallen down but picked myself back up again to get a new start in life. When I was younger, I thought nothing could make me happier than being a singer, but like with any career, a lot of things are different from how I imagined them to be, and sometimes I felt so insignificant. But if I think of myself as a circle, while other people just see a simple shape, there’s a centripetal force at play that lets me keep my shape through collisions of energies inside me. The music video really reflects that cycle of sadness and happiness, of emotions dissipating and being reborn. Like in Buddhism, if life has a beginning, it must have an end, and each end leads to being reborn as someone or something else. And I believe humans can’t escape that cycle. For me, “Viola” is about life onstage and behind the scenes, but for listeners, I hope the song feels like a metaphor for their own everyday lives, giving them both a sense of connection and of comfort.

The title I Did is written in past tense, not present. It seems like that might tie into the theme of emotional cycles as well.
Yves: Everyone’s had that experience where you put in a lot of work but in the end it isn’t clear what you have to show for all your effort. I’ve had those moments where I felt crushed or powerless. People will have their own opinions about the album, but for me, it made me feel things I never could before and made for a new start with Engdu. “I Did” means exactly what it says. I deliberately left out the subject of the title to leave behind a strong, simple message about all the times I laughed, cried, or felt anxious that led to the title.

I guess it makes sense when you say all the emotions you felt while searching for peace make up the theme of your album.
Yves: The word that came up most frequently while telling the producers my life story was “peace.” For me, peace is closely tied to stability. Ever since I was young, the sense of security that came from my family and friends has had a huge effect on my happiness, so every time I make a wish on a birthday cake, it’s always a long one about other people—but the short version is, “I wish for everyone to be happy.” That’s what I wanted to capture with my music. The intro track “Viola” uses hyperpop to convey the chaos and feeling of being shaken up when you start something new. Then with “Hashtag,” the next track, I wanted to play with an R&B beat to take a deeper look at the chaos of the different parts of my identity introduced in the first song. Then “Gone Girl” slows things down, delving into melancholy, and “Tik Tok” is a nostalgic look at the things I used to love. And last there’s “DIM,” the ending of which is strictly instrumental. I wanted that part to get listeners to reflect on their own thoughts and memories instead of focusing on my voice or lyrics to quiet their emotions and find peace. Engdu told me over and over that this album made them feel happy and peaceful, and I feel genuinely grateful for that.

The spectrum of your vocals feels wider than ever on this album, with different vibes and personas for each song.
Yves: When I sing with a group, I put a lot of power into my vocals to make sure I could be heard properly. Now I’m solo and I have to cover so many different parts, so I take several different approaches depending on the vibe of the song—sometimes putting more emphasis on the rhythm, other times on the lyrics, for example. For this album, I kept being told to soften up on my vocals completely and sing like someone who’s reached nirvana. I feel like hyperpop is about using less technique and avoiding anything flashy when it comes to the vocals. So when recording “Viola,” I tried to sing in a calm and uniform tone to fit with the genre and get the message in the lyrics across, rather than being restrained by any particular vocalization technique. I was really determined not to walk away from this album with any regrets after recording, so even when the director said it was fine, I was really insistent: “No. We definitely have to do another take for that part. We have to rerecord it.” (laughs) Thankfully, the directors heard me out and made the whole recording process a lot of fun.

It sounds like you’re a bit of a perfectionist. You even rated yourself just five out of 10 on promoting LOOP.
Yves: I’m the type of person who, once I set my mind on something, I have to see it through to the end. It’s the same way when I’m producing. That could explain why Engdu always said I’d do just fine being stranded alone on a desert island. (laughs) I never knew I was a perfectionist, but then while going through everything together with the rest of LOONA, they said to me once, “You’re way too hard on yourself.” At some point, I started to feel like that aspect of my personality was taking a lot out of me, so I made a major effort to loosen up. Now I’m just trying to do my best so that when I look back someday, I can say, “I really did my best—no regrets.” I gave myself a five for my last album since it was just the beginning, but this time, since it was a good continuation from LOOP, I’ll add two points—plus one more for giving it my all. That’s eight points in total. (laughs)

You even poured yourself completely into the part-time cafe job you took up as a special event to promote LOOP and went as far as to memorize the menu. Did your experience living alone in a cramped student housing district and working part-time before you debuted shape who you are today?
Yves: Honestly, the everyday Ha Soo-young lives like the youngest kid in a family. I love lying around and eating food someone else made for me. (laughs) But as Yves, I’ve become the kind of person to take on the role of big sister, roll up my sleeves, and get things done on my own. When I look back now at my life before debuting—working part-time and going out into the world—I know I was really worn out at the time, but I’m grateful now for that experience because it made me tough enough to weather the challenges of being a singer and get back up again. It also helped me provide guidance to the younger members of the group and let them know how to do things. And most importantly of all, working part-time taught me that every job is important, which is why I strive never to forget to express gratitude toward people I deal with and anyone who helps me out.

Your tour is called the APPLE CINNAMON CRUNCH TOUR, which shows you’re holding onto the identity marker you received during your group days—the apple. It seems like you embrace your past even while forging a new path for yourself.
Yves: I’m really grateful and touched that apples have become a symbol that people associate me with now. And in the biblical story, Eve’s apple is forbidden fruit—she gets punished for eating something she wasn’t supposed to and a whole new situation unfolds. That’s why I see the apple as representing rebellion or adventure. That meaning aligns perfectly with the direction I want to take under the name Yves, so it’s something I’m going to keep with me going forward.

You seem to feel deep gratitude for everyone who supports you right from the bottom of your heart.
Yves: I had a year off before my solo debut, and I felt really trapped, like time was moving forward while I was stuck still—like I was chained up by my hands and feet. Then one night, I had a dream. I was standing on top of a tall building, and the wind was whipping all around me. I looked up into the sky and saw this incredibly sturdy rope descending right down to me. Without hesitation, I grabbed it—and that’s when I woke up. Looking back, I feel like that rope descending from an improbable place was Engdu. When I felt lost and uncertain about who I was, it was my fans who grabbed me and gave me room to breathe. I believe they’re the reason I was able to make it to where I am today.

It reminds me of your welcome message to your fans: “Hi. I missed you. I promise to make you feel even happier from now on.”
Yves: I wanted to send them the message that, even if we’ve only met online, Engdu is really important to me and I want to make them happy. Seeing everyone around me happy makes me happy. I don’t think happiness is about my own happiness alone. I think I’ll continue making music not just to pursue my own happiness but in the hopes that people who come across my music and anyone who becomes connected to me in any way will be happy, too. Sometimes people tell me I think too much, but the fact that Engdu likes me for that very reason gives me the confidence to stay true to myself every day. I just want to say thank you.